Are you confused by parenting advice from experts who contradict each other? Concerned about the possible effects of being a working mother? Terrified of turning into your own parents?

Parents today are overwhelmed with elaborate advice on how to raise babies. In How Not to F*** Them Up leading child psychologist Oliver James argues that it's not our children that must be trained ... it's us.

Meticulously researched, inspiring and yet provocative, How Not to F*** Them Up raises important questions about the way in which we bring up our children: Do we, as a society, provide enough support for parents? How has the role of the father changed in recent years? Can a working mum ever reconcile her career with her family life?

Drawing on extensive interviews, James identifies three basic types of mum: the Hugger, the Organiser and the Fleximum. Outlining the benefits and pitfalls of each, James offers simple strategies to reconcile parents' personal ambition and desire for a career with the needs of the family and maintaining a work/life balance.

By challenging our ingrained and often flawed beliefs, James shows us how our own childhood experiences can impact on our perception of 'the family', and how ultimately we can provide the happy, and stable, environment that all babies and toddlers need, regardless of our own upbringing.

What the critics say...

I agree with Oliver James. Caring for a baby or toddler is personal, because you have to tune in to the child's changing needs.
Sue PalmerThe Times

At last, something for the modern mother! A sane voice amid the shrill cacophony of childcare books
Imogen Edwards-Jones

A book that you can trust with your children
The Independent

In a perfect world every parent would have a parenting masterclass before the baby arrives. This is the next best thing!
Arabella Weir

James is truly on the side of women and creating a society in which parenting and the issues it raises are shared between both partners.
Louise CarpenterThe Times Magazine